in:spa

in:spa, Monasterio 16-23 August 2012

To put things in perspective, I’m not (I think) fat. But, apart from times when I’ve been ill (once in my late teens in Thailand), I’ve almost never been as thin as I’d like. So I can scarcely remember a time when I haven’t had what psycho-babblers call “ishoos” with food. I love it. I love cooking it and I love devouring it. But every mouthful comes freighted with notions of “good” or “bad”. Fruit, vegetables, pulses, complex carbs, protein – all good. Processed food, saturated fat, sugar – all bad, very bad.

The result is that I seem to have spent my entire adult life on a diet. I have endured Dukan, Atkins et al at home; I have been abroad and done deprivation in extremis at the Mayr, macrobiotics and colonics at SHA and dosha diagnosis at Ananda. I have learned, through exhaustive empirical research, that a couple of factors are pivotal to success: camaraderie and scenery. Dieting it on one’s own, at home, is a slog. What most of us need is company, encouragement, guidance, sunshine and the occasional shaking of the stick.

Armed with this knowledge, I signed up to spend a week on an in:spa detox. I’ve never managed to detox autonomously. It always seemed at odds with the day-to-day demands of, well, living, and to require the discipline of an Olympic athlete, which my errant willpower fails to yield. And yet the benefits seem to be universally acknowledged: glowing skin, sprightlier spirit and, of course, weight loss.

Kathryn Brierley, Director of the Healthy Holiday Company (and former high-flying city executive) explains that her objective in establishing in:spa was to devise the ultimate luxury fitness holiday. Whilst the juxtaposition of those three words -‘luxury’, ‘fitness’ and ‘holiday’- might sound somewhat oxymoronic, I can attest that the holistic approach to health - a magical amalgam of fabulous, wholesome food and a teeming timetable of activities in a stunning setting – resulted in as enjoyable and sumptuous a break as I have ever experienced.

No in:spa holiday is identical, but the essential formula is the same: a group of up to thirty guests, plus a cook, dietician, yoga teacher, masseuse and personal trainers, takes up temporary residency in one of a range of enchanting boutique properties in Spain, France or Morocco. I had booked myself onto an ‘intense’ week, the setting for which was a somnolent converted monastery in Southern Spain. I was trepidatious when, on day one I was presented with a formidable timetable. My schedule for the week seemed distressingly full – exercise, nutritional consultations, massages, exercise classes, even lectures. I was worried that I had bitten off more than I could chew.

In fact, as the week went on, I found that I couldn’t get enough. Never an early riser, I found myself up at dawn, while the air was still cool, in the converted stables doing hatha yoga, or running 5k, on days when I felt more energetic. I enjoyed doing masses of exercise: hikes, circuits and personal training sessions, especially the dance class with Malcolm (a world renowned dancer who has worked under the direction of Ben Elton). The twin highlights of the week for me, though, were my sessions with the outstanding masseur, Ethan and the fascinating personal nutritional consultation with Lorraine.

To complement this action-packed agenda, the daily menus were assiduously planned and executed by Sophie, the superb chef, in consultation with Lorraine.  Certain foods were firmly out: wheat, dairy, gluten tea, coffee, alcohol, salt, sugar and red meat. The compulsory removal of these things made it all – relatively – easy – it turns out that absence does make the heart forget, especially when there was such an abundance of yummy alternatives: outrageously fresh fruit, fish, nuts and vibrant vegetables. I learned from Lorraine that starving the body is not what losing weight or being well is all about. There were compulsory snacks at 11am and 4pm daily (“If you go too long without eating,” Lorraine told us, “your body thinks there’s a famine and starts hoarding fat”).

I came back detoxed, re-educated, de-stressed and re-energised - bright of eye, bushy of tail and a couple of pounds lighter, which admittedly isn’t a lot, but my week at in:spa had introduced me to the novel notion that I wouldn’t die if I gave up tea, coffee and alcohol, and to the key concept that diet must be combined with exercise.

Best of all, I came back with a clutch of new chums from my cohort (the staggering majority of which were repeat guests) – including a former ambassador and the CEO of a multinational company.

in:spa is a blast – whether you’re feeling tubby or tired, take your friends, have a ball and come back glowing, minus a few kilos.